Turning Liabilities into Assets
While in St. Louis my husband was reading the newspaper and found an article about a Georgia woman who went to the police because she felt she got low quality crack for her “hard eaned” money. The Peoria police wouldn’t want to deal with that type of problem so the city has decided to rate the local drug houses and make their ratings available for the consumers. Drug houses are rated on several things such as quality, quantity, police response time, conviction rate, and the number of bullet holes in the house. The drug houses are then given their “baggy” rating.
4 baggies is the best. It is the cadillac of drug houses. Look for developers to be asking the city for incentives to build it and the area into an “attraction”.
3 baggies is good. You can quite easily get your drugs, a 40 ounce and a pay day loan in one convenient trip.
2 baggies is fair. You may get pot or you may get lawn clippings. It is a total crap shoot.
1 baggy is poor. Stop by the visitor’s bureau for a bulletproof vest rental, you’ll probably need it.
0 baggies, just throw your money away and kick your own ass. It will save time and possibly your life.
A list will be avalible at the visitor’s bureau and select Peoria locations so be sure to pick up yours and support our Peoria economy.
City of Peoria | | 
August 16, 2007 9:44 am
jenjw4, August 16, 2007 @ 10:55 am
Hmmm… not sure I’d want to read the whore house ratings….
East Bluff Barbie, August 16, 2007 @ 1:39 pm
Jen,
You preempted one of my next posts. I just need the inspiration to get it done.
Ricky Bobby, August 16, 2007 @ 7:07 pm
Please oh baby Jesus, forgive East Bluff Barbie and help mend her evil ways. Dear cute little baby Jesus, help her to understand that she must surrender her spare dimes and nickels to help the needy, such as Ameren, the city, and our State who still doesn’t know what a budget is…
In baby Jesus’ name I pray…
eastbluffbarbie, August 17, 2007 @ 9:22 am
Ricky Bobby, did you already obtain the drug list?
East Bluff, August 18, 2007 @ 1:00 pm
Barbie, do you have any addresses on the 3 baggie locations? I could use a vacation, I work way too many hours. That leads to my next request, jenjw4
mentioned whore houses, can we hope this list will be cumming soon? Im not getting any younger and being on me feet all day is getting harder. Maybe a nice lay down job would be good.
Oh yeah, Ricky you seem like such a sweet guy will you please pray for me too.
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