New Years Resolutions in the East Bluff
Many people make New Years Resolutions. Some are kept. Some aren’t. Here are some that I am sure will be heard in the good old East Bluff:
Quit teasing the animals at Glen Oak Zoo. If a tiger in San Francisco can attacked when provoked, the paint chip eating geniuses around here are as good as doomed.
Mow the grass before the “Notice to Abate” sign is posted by code enforcement.
Make drivers only wait 3 minutes for all the kids to move out of the middle of the street instead of 5-10 minutes.
Go green! Start recycling empty 40 ouncers of Mickey’s instead of tossing them in a random yard.
Ringing the Ghetto door bell (parking in the middle of the street and honking until someone comes out, usually a 20 minute process) only 6 times instead of 15.
Knowing the names of all your illegitimate children and their mothers.
Hope everyone has a safe and Happy New Year! May you be able to keep your resolutions! 
New Years | eastbluffbarbie | 
December 31, 2007 9:20 pm
mostprepossessing, January 2, 2008 @ 8:38 pm
God, I miss ring the ghetto doorbell being played at 3:00 a.m. “I’ve got the cash, you bring the crack, but I’m too lasy to get our of my car.”
East Bluff Barbie, January 2, 2008 @ 8:48 pm
In some places bringing the crack to the car is considered customer service!
Todd, January 2, 2008 @ 9:24 pm
At least it was nice that Peoria bucked last year’s headline by NOT having a homicide on the first day of the new year.
Paul Wilkinson, January 3, 2008 @ 1:04 am
If only that was limited to the East Bluff. We would add
Stop leaving the trail of medical waste from the corner plasma shop directly to the crack house…make more a challenge for the police dept.
I was sure we had some significant success in helping clear out our area this summer, but New Year’s Eve was a true test. Normally there are more gunshots that at a drunken NRA convention being fired into the air at midnight. This year there were two shots with five returned. We believe they must have finally shot each other because it was quiet after that in our area. Normally I stop counting at a 100 gunshots.
We’ll take that progress.
Have a merry one.
Paul
Fraochan, January 3, 2008 @ 11:53 am
LMAOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You crack me up!
jenjw4, January 3, 2008 @ 12:57 pm
My part of the world (a whole 20 miles nw of Peoria) is sounding so boring. I’m starting to feel a little jealous about all your merry pranksters. Maybe I’ll start a game of late night ding dong ditch in my neighborhood. (I’ll just have to remember to skip the houses with the NRA bumper stickers on the trucks in the drive way)