Askewed News » stupid people http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com Sarcasm you can depend on! Wed, 13 May 2009 21:28:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 en hourly 1 Really???? http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2009/01/27/really/ http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2009/01/27/really/#comments Tue, 27 Jan 2009 16:57:39 +0000 eastbluffbarbie http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/?p=124 If only I had my camera with me today. I was driving down Lake between Sheridan and Knoxville. There was a sign on a florist’s shop that says they have “balloon bokays”. Really? Bokays? I know what a bouquet is but I know I’ve never seen a bokay. I’m sure their balloon bokays are bootiful. ;)

]]> http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2009/01/27/really/feed/ 4 Why?????? http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2008/12/18/why/ http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2008/12/18/why/#comments Fri, 19 Dec 2008 00:49:39 +0000 eastbluffbarbie http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/?p=114 I just need to rant a bit.

Why the fuck were they filling potholes on War Memorial this morning?

Why the fuck doesn’t Kmart sell crotch socks (men’s tube socks that go above the knee for those who don’t know)?

Why the fuck did the city make this new snow plan?

Why the fuck doesn’t Walmart have beer on tap to make dealing with the asshats easier?

Why the fuck does it always look like a bomb went off in Big Lots?

Why the fuck can’t you buy orange juice, milk, and cereal at Kroger on Wisconsin without them assuming you are on WIC?

Why the fuck does the Kroger on Wisconsin have condoms, pregnancy tests and Axe body spray under lock and key at the pharmacy? Maybe if they unlocked the condoms there would be no need for the pregnancy test!

Why the fuck did I have to listen to my cashier’s weight loss testimonial when there was a line accumulating behind me?

Why the fuck did District 150 have to have a teachers institute tomorrow? Don’t they realize that I’m already going to be spending 2 PMS fueled weeks with my children?

Why the fuck did someone else agree to marry Drew Peterson? Start writing your will and digging your grave now, honey.

Why the fuck do I have strange, vivid dreams every single night? It is no wonder I am worn out all the time.

Why the fuck does Christmas have to be next week? Can’t we delay it a month? I’m sure I’d be more prepared then. ;)

I think I have it out of my system for the time being. :)

]]> http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2008/12/18/why/feed/ 9 The Post Election Future is Scary http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2008/10/28/the-post-election-future-is-scary/ http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/2008/10/28/the-post-election-future-is-scary/#comments Tue, 28 Oct 2008 19:16:13 +0000 eastbluffbarbie http://askewednews.blogpeoria.com/?p=106 With the upcoming election I have realized how scary the future is. There are all these stories about voter registration fraud. Signing up the starting line up of the Dallas Cowboys – mildly entertaining. Then it crossed the line. I heard someone signed up Duran Duran, not the members of the band mind you, but First Name: Duran; Last Name: Duran. WTF? How stupid are these people? You don’t have to be an evil genius to open a phone book or any book for that matter and find more realistic names. At least use band names like Molly Hatchet or Jethro Tull. Shit, and what happened to the classics? Have they exhausted Mike Hunt, Peter Dragon, John P. Ness, Dick Hertz, I.P. Freely and Seymour Butts?
Here is the really scary part. After the election these brain surgeons will be unemployeed. They are going to be bagging our groceries, making our Big Macs, wiping our asses when we head off to the home and generally spreading douchebaggery where ever they go. Oh, I shudder to think of it.

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